How To Be A Better Mom Even Though You’re Just So Tired

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I was 23 when I became a mother and I was not prepared in any way, shape or form for how my life was about to change. It took its toll on me in a huge way. Five years after my first child, I became a mother again — and was still not prepared. I now had to adjust to life with two children.

When I was on maternity leave with my second child, there was a day that I will never forget and it’s a day that I hope to never relive.

This day ended with me locking myself in the bathroom. Tears streaming down my face and clutching my legs, I tried to compose myself so that I could go on and resume my life like a mother should.

Why was I so upset?

Minutes before I locked myself in the bathroom, I had completely lost it on my husband because he had the nerve to ask me, “What did you do today?”

WHAT DID I DO? Are you kidding me? I unleashed in a fit of rage a long list of things I managed to accomplish in my zombie-like, sleep-deprived state. I could barely look at my husband because I wanted to rip his head off. I resented him for even having the nerve to ask me such a basic question. “What did I do?” I mean, really!

Looking back on this day, that’s a side to myself that I hope to never see again.

Not only did I lose it on my husband, but I also took my anger out on my kids. I was miserable to be around and motherhood was taking its toll on me.

It’s so easy for us mothers to blame anger or lack of patience on being exhausted.

Parenting is hard — really hard — but for the health of your kids, your spouse, and even yourself, you cannot let anger consume you through exhaustion.  

That is the lesson I learned that day. This lesson that brought me to tears and made me snap on my husband for simply asking, “what did you do today?” was one hard lesson.

Looking back I realize that he was actually asking how my day went. He was trying to start a conversation. I was so blinded by my own rage and exhaustion, I couldn’t see that.

So what’s the answer? How can we be great moms even though we are so exhausted? It’s an exhaustion that brings us to tears and has us begging for some sort of relief.

Although I don’t have all the answers, I do have 10 tips that have certainly helped me. These tips might seem simple and so obvious, but as mothers we forget the simple things. We’re busy and life gets hectic, so take a minute for yourself and read through these tips. They might just surprise you.

This one is a struggle, especially for someone like me who loves their sleep.

I have to admit that there are days where I don’t do this, but I can tell you that on the days I do get up before my kids we have a far more productive day.

If you can take care of yourself before you have to meet the needs of your kids, it can really help improve your mood for the day.

Kick start your day with a nice hot shower.

There’s nothing better than feeling refreshed first thing in the morning — and a shower can totally do that for you.

It may be hard to find the time to sneak in a hot shower, but it’s totally worth it to try.

So often, moms fall into this stereotypical “mom uniform.”

It usually consists of some sort of sweats or leggings and a baggy shirt. Make it a point to get up and put on clothes that you would feel comfortable leaving the house in.

If that’s yoga pants and a clean shirt that’s cool, but at least make sure you’re getting out of your PJs.

OK, take that with a grain of salt.

I don’t mean stop cleaning all together, I mean just stop stressing about it. A bit of mess is OK. We have to do a certain amount of living, so to keep our houses looking like something out of a magazine is ridiculous.

Nobody lives like that — well, at least people with kids don’t.

You know what the Snickers commercials say — “You’re not you when you’re hungry.”

This is so true. Don’t forget to eat. Even if it’s just snacking here and there, you’re no good to your kids if you’re hangry.

If your kids are driving you up the wall — and this will happen — get outside.

Go somewhere where there are no walls and let them run free for a bit. It will totally help.

If it’s crappy out, try and take them to an indoor play place. Let them climb the walls there and you can sit down for a few minutes.

Sure, rules are necessary, but there are some rules that you can totally relax on.

We need to throw this idea of perfection out the window. No one is a perfect parent — no one.

And on that note, don’t worry about what other parents are doing and stop comparing yourself to other moms.

While we’re talking about rules, it’s totally OK to say no. 

“No” is such a powerful word and you should use it to liberate yourself. Realize what you can handle and then just say no to all the rest.

Make time to talk to another adult each and every day. 

There is only so much baby talk and singing that we can handle. Make time to have an adult conversation with a spouse or friend.

Let’s not forget that we’re more than just parents.

 

This is a big one. 

When you’re up in the middle of the night rocking a screaming baby, it’s so easy to say you wish they would just grow up — but remember, there will come a time when you have no baby to cuddle or rock.

By following these 10 tips, I’ve greatly improved myself — not just for me, but for my family as well. I wouldn’t trade the sleepless nights, screaming kids, or even the potty training for anything.

I am proud to be a mother. Cherish the moment and be grateful for it.

Here’s one of my favorite moments.

What’s yours?

If you have any tips to share, help a mother out! Share your tips by commenting below! 

Share this post with a mother in need!

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Til’ next time 😀

Holly

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5 thoughts on “How To Be A Better Mom Even Though You’re Just So Tired

  1. Good tips, even though I’m not a mom. I feel your compassion in the helpful tips, and I want to wish you
    a Very Happy Mothers Day, Holly. Keep smiling.

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